


Courtship

by vyduan



Category: Alias (TV)
Genre: F/M, Flirting, Innuendo, Phone Conversations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:42:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23866984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vyduan/pseuds/vyduan
Summary: A series of phone conversations between Sydney and Sark.
Relationships: Sydney Bristow/Julian Sark
Kudos: 15





	Courtship

"Good evening, Agent Bristow."  
  
"What do you want, Sark? How did you get this number?"  
  


"I just wanted to get to know my new partner a bit before we began working together in earnest."

"I don't work with terrorists. And Dixon's my partner."

"Yes, you do. And no, not anymore."

"What have you done with Dixon?"

"I haven't done anything. Sloane had him reassigned."

"Why would he do that?"

"He simply thought his two best agents should work together."

"You are not his best agent."

"I suppose we shall see, won't we."

"No, we won't. Sloane will hear from me about this."

"You're not going to say anything to Sloane, Sydney."

"I'm not?"

"Just think what your beloved Agent Vaughn will say when you tell him of your new partnership. I have no doubt the CIA will be gratified for the opportunity this presents."

***

"Why are you here, Sark?"

"Why are _you_ here, Sydney?"

"I love my country."

"Your country is a voracious lover. How many more of your friends will she devour?"

"Is that a threat?"

"Merely a statement of fact. Neither of your employers care about you or your little friends."

"And your employers do?"

"You have no idea why I am here. How can you presume to know the motives of my employer?"

"Tell me."

"Come work with me, Sydney, and I'll tell you all you wish to know."

"I've told you this before, Sark. You're cute, but I'll pass."

***

"Have dinner with me."

"No."

"Please."

"Well, since you said, 'Please,' consider that an emphatic 'No' with a 'Hell to the' appended before it."

"Oh Sydney. How sad for you, mangling Whitney as a comeback. You're losing your acerbic touch."

"I didn't know Sloane let you out enough for you to catch the reference."

"I don't answer to Sloane, Sydney. You, of all people, should recognize that."

"Then who do you answer to?"

"Have dinner with me."

***

"You never answered my question."

"You never followed up."

"You diverted my attention."

"Was it with my eyes or the crook of my lips? Rather obvious, your staring."

"We're done."

***

"Sloane wants us wheels up in an hour."

"It's 3 in the morning. Why can't super-evil-geniuses move their pawns at a more civil time?"

"I'll make sure he gets the memo. Now, unless you've truly begun to appreciate my voice against your naked ear, I suggest you get going."

"Ass."

"See you soon, Sydney."

***

"So, what did he say just now?"

"What did who say?"

"Agent Vaughn."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"He didn't look pleased. There were more than the usual number of wrinkles on his forehead."

"Stop spying on me. I happen to like his wrinkles."

"Oh yes, they're quite becoming. But whatever you told him, he wasn't happy. It wasn't his, I'm-worried-about-you-Sydney-face. Nor was it his I-want-you-though-I'm-your-handler-and-I-have-a-girlfriend-face. Come to think of it, they're really quite similar. No, I must say, if I had to categorize it, it was an I-don't-approve-of-your-methods-but-Syd-can-kick-my-ass-face."

"Sounds like someone has a man-crush."

"I do not have a man-crush. And if I did, it would certainly not be your pallid Agent Vaughn."

"If you didn't, why do you know his faces so well? And why do you have such cute names for them? I think you have a man-crush. In fact, you may be jealous of the ways he looks at me. I'd thought with your particular delicacies, you'd prefer a burlier man, but -- "

"I am _not_ delicate."

"Ok, prim. Do you prefer dainty?"

"I find you tedious."

***

"So, what do you think of the new guy, Mr. Blake?"

"Can't stand him. Reminds me of you."

"Want me to kill him for you? I cannot suffer anyone else to abide the same place in your affections."

"If it causes you that much pain then I shall allow him to live for now. When he ceases to rankle me, feel free to dispose of him."

"You wound me."

"Good night, Sark."

***

"For such a mendacious person, Sydney, your capicity for self-righteousness is really quite remarkable."

"Must you always substitute perfectly fine, normal words? What is wrong with deceitful or dishonest? Why can't you just call me a liar?"

"Fine. You're a consummate liar."

"Had to throw in consummate, didn't you?"

"Perhaps that's just where my thoughts are leading."

"Not a chance."

"I didn't say I was thinking of you."

"Tease."

"Only if I have no intention on making good. And I have every intention."

***

"How was your date last night?"

"She was just a friend."

" _She_ sure didn't think so."

"I don't date."

"But you have friends?"

"No. You should learn to do the same."

"And here I thought we were getting along so well."

"I don't forget who I am, Sydney. Neither should you."

***

"Don't you ever tire of being bad, Sark?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"What's to get tired of? I'm the best at what I do. I dictate all my own terms. I get extravagantly compensated. If you'd only take the time to truly consider my offer."

"No."

"Don't you ever tire of being good? Always on the side of Truth and Justice for All. Impossible, really. Evil is better looking, better paying and better dressed. And, because of these factors, we also have an inexhaustible supply of recruits."

"I don't think you're evil."

"Ah, how easily your prevarications glide off your tongue."

"I didn't say you were good. I think you're the worst kind, actually. Amoral. No cause but yourself."

"At least I'm never disappointed."

***

"I suppose congratulations are in order. The Alliance, and our partnership, is no more."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"I guess it will do no good to ask you where you are, will it?"

"No. But the offer still stands. Come work with me, Sydney, and I'll tell you all you wish to know."

"Goodbye, Sark."

"Goodbye, Sydney."


End file.
